by Steve “Tuna” Tornovish
Are evil scientists born or made?
I cannot tell you the answer today to this age-old question, but seeing how I’m currently conducting a series of diabolical experiments, I have a feeling that I’m well on my way to finding out.
Now calm down, folks: I’m not doing really evil things like trying to develop a flu virus that will kill millions, crush economies, and bring life as we know it to a screeching halt. Seriously, no one is that evil, right? Nah, I’m more of a “garden – variety” scientist. My scheme is all about developing a worldwide network of awesome young fishers who will dominate the island beaches for years to come.
Any evil scientist worth his or her salt needs a role model. I can only think of one who has all of the proper qualities. A misunderstood genius…a man who wants a better world but goes about things in an unconventional way…a guy who loves hanging out with an amazing supporting cast. Yes, my evil scientist career will be modeled after the wonderful Gene Wilder, who starred in the hilarious 1974 classic movie, “Young Frankenstein.” Wilder’s take on Dr. Victor Frankenstein shows us that it’s just got to be in your blood. Try as he might have to repress his true nature, ol’ Dr. Victor couldn’t avoid getting pulled back into the family business.
I come from a fishing family. My grandfather (and namesake), Steve Tornovish, ran a fishing boat on the Great Lakes, laying out nets with his brother and sons. The Tornovish crew worked hard and faced down all of the challenges that nature and government could throw at them. My dad moved on from the commercial fishing life but it always haunted him. Today, my brother Billy and I keep the family fishing genes going strong (and let’s not overlook our sister, Lisa, a well-known fluke killer!).
Dr. Victor Frankenstein was all in on creating his glorious monster. So am I. But much like my esteemed role model, I need parts to work with. Dr. Victor sent the unforgettable Igor (Marty Feldman, with the movable hump on his back) out to fetch body parts. My experiment had to be somewhat more subtle. I decided to use a combination of awesome local Nantucket kids, as well as kids whose unsuspecting parents hired me to take their vacationing families out fishing. My laboratory would be spread across the vast expanse of Great Point. And my gauge for success would be the junior division leader board of the August Blues charity fishing tournament. Mwahahahaha!! (Pro tip: if you ever need a chuckle, just google “evil laugh”—the results are too funny!)
My first victims…I mean experimental subjects or let’s just say “clients”…were the Poston family from Raleigh, NC. The wonderful and unsuspecting Max and Ashley Poston were lured into letting me fish with their two awesome kids. Wells, their son, is 11 years old, and he just loves to fish! Their daughter, Reese, is 9. From what I observed, Reese will grow to be a force of nature. She has a strong competitiveness streak that I admired from the get-go!
Ashley and I talked a lot about the criteria for the August Blues junior tournament. She was all-in on helping her kids submit any fish that they caught during our trip. We headed out to Great Point on August 1, opening day for the monthlong event. The wind was blowing at a better than brisk pace out of the southwest, a fairly common situation for the Nantucket summer. Thus, the best fishing was going to be on the inside position of Great Point on the way to Coatue.
Upon our arrival, the conditions looked promising. Birds were going crazy across the bay, diving on unseen baitfish. The long streak of windy days from the southwest had piled up an aggravating amount of seaweed for us to contend with on every cast. But I had a feeling that if we worked at it, we would catch some fish. Or, at least, enjoy an amazing day on a beautiful beach. Win-win, right?
I talked with Wells about the tournament. He loves to fish and was excited to participate. Our discussion went like this:
Steve Tuna: “So if I cast my rod out and hook a fish and you reel it in, does it count as a fish that you can enter in the tournament?”
Wells: “Nope. I have to cast on my own, hook a fish and reel it in all by myself.”
Tears in my eyes! This kid is the best—great integrity and a can-do spirit. And, guess what: he did it! Wells persisted, casting better with every attempt, making corrections and dealing with the wind and the seaweed until he hooked up and landed a respectable 27.25 inch bluefish! Ashley fought through the spotty internet service on the outreaches of Coatue and entered her son’s fish on the tournament’s easy to use (and FREE for anglers 17 and under) website. Wells was on the August Blues leaderboard! My first experiment was a huge success… Mwahahahaha!!
Max knew that his responsibility as a dad was to hook up a fish for his daughter. He did so, and Reese landed her (non-tournament eligible) bluefish. Peace was restored for the Poston family. The day was a huge success!
Now for phase two of my plan…
I had selected a perfect Nantucket family for this next step. John and Amy Seip moved their family from Wisconsin to Nantucket about three years ago. Amy told me that her mom loved the Nantucket-based sitcom “Wings” so much that Amy took her to visit the island. She loved it here, and her wheels began to turn.
“I searched for openings for physical therapist positions and Nantucket Cottage Hospital came right up!” Amy still chuckles at the amazing coincidence. She dropped the hint with John and the seed germinated shortly thereafter. They talked it over with their three boys—Malachi, now almost 16 years old, Finnley, now 13, and Solomon (Sully), now 11. The Seip family agreed that they would give island life a try.
I first met the Seip family at Summer Street Church. They are wonderful. It’s so great to see their family dynamic. The boys may all be spaced two years apart, but they always demonstrate a deep love and respect for each other. We got talking about fishing, of course, and one thing led to another. The church held a fishing trip for the guys, and I got to work with the Seip boys. I could see that all three of them share their dad’s sense of adventure. Later on, I lent them a fishing rod so that the boys could continue to learn. I looked forward to my Sunday updates on their progress.
It was obvious to me that these awesome young men would fit nicely into my experiment. I contacted John and Amy, and a trip was planned. We headed out to Great Point on Day 2 of the August Blues tournament. Mwahahahaha!!
Our trip was a quick hitter before sunset due to our mutual work schedules. John is busy fixing people (hey, did I mention that my casting shoulder feels like it might fall off soon?), and Amy works with the Nantucket Historical Association as the finance manager. The boys were excited, as was I. We discussed the tournament rules, much like I did with Wells the day before. The Seip boys were so ready!
Fishing reveals personalities. I watched as Malachi led the charge. He’s thoughtful, tough, smart, and caring: a natural leader. Malachi’s casting was textbook perfect. I suggested one minor correction to increase body turn, and his distance improved dramatically. Finnley is the quiet one, with still waters that run very deep. He spoke not a word but went straight to his work, as they say. Sully, the youngest of the three, was the wild one who was working overtime to keep up with his older and taller brothers. I coached Sully on smoothing out some technique issues, and soon he was casting like a champion. The laboratory conditions were perfect!
“I’m on!” Finnley, my quiet one, only had to say those two words to make my day! He worked his fish in his usual nonchalant manner until it was flopping on the beach. Amy took over from there, taking a photo against the measuring tape and submitting the fish. Now my evil plan was really cooking: I had a second junior entry, and the Seip family was one step closer to qualifying for the inaugural August Blues family division title! Mwahahahaha!!
Two trips with junior anglers, two entries on the leaderboard! In the immortal words of Gene Wilder: “It’s alive!!” And it’s just beginning, folks. I plan to keep the laboratory cooking, getting more and more junior anglers out on the beach, casting, hooking, and landing fish for the rest of the month. Be forewarned, good citiz ens of Nantucket! Mwahahahaha!!
Steve “Tuna” Tornovish is a Nantucket native who has spent his life fishing from the beaches of his beloved island. He loves to introduce clients to the joy of fishing with his Nantucket Island Fishing Adventures: stevetuna.com